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We have all lost loved ones or experienced some significant life changing circumstances. And for us here in Swaziland it is becoming a bigger reality every day! After loosing Mamba last year, we realized that none of us was really equipped to help the kids at his carepoint deal with their emotions. (Or maybe even ourselves!)

Of course it didn’t stop with Mamba. In January a little girl at one of our other carepoints was shot dead at night in her own home. And two weeks ago another little girl was run over by a car on her way to school and she (and her dad) died on the scene. Two days ago we read in the local newspaper of two teenage girls whose bodies were found somewhere in a field; only discovering later that one of the girls was the daughter of a lady cooking at one of our city carepoints. We are also seeing the wide-ranging impact and effect of AIDS more and more.

There are many heartbreaking stories like these that I can tell you about, but the ongoing question is: How do we handle all these deaths and the related emotions that go with loss, without being overwhelmed, and feeling almost paralyzed by the vastness of the issue.  Can we pretend like nothing has happened – too scared to feel, because if I do I might just lie on the floor, curl up in a little ball, start crying, and not get up again…. How do the kids handle this?
Swazi’s do not show a lot of emotion, but that doesn’t mean that they don’t feel it, nor that they aren’t hurting, or are somehow resistant to the things that has happened in their lives. They have all lost loved ones and have experienced some form of neglect, abandonment and rejection. In fact, more that 70% of our carepoint kids have been rejected or abandoned in some way at some stage in their short little lives. How do we help them deal with all their cropped up emotions and feelings of worthlessness?

Well, we trust that we have been able to start this process of ‘dealing with pain’ through our project we started this week. I am excited to say that yesterday we started our first day of grief training with the help of an old friend of mine! Actually, JoE (Ettienne) used to be my team leader in 1998 and now he trains local community volunteers in South Africa to present the Lost&Found courses in their own communities. Lost&Found is an emotional support program, presented in small groups, focusing on enabling young people to identify and work through feelings and emotions related to grief and loss and to help them cope with the life changing events related to loss.   Lost&Found is run by a non-profit called facingUP. Not only do we have JoE here with us, but we also have a couple from England. Pete and Many English present the Lost&Found courses in England (UK) and are visiting us to assist with the presentation of the groups.

During the next three weeks we will be presenting L&F groups to four staff groups and four carepoint groups. In total 72 people will be enabled to grow in the their own understanding of their loss, they will be equipped to have a better understanding for other people in their communities, and gain insight into what others are experiencing. Already – even though we have barely started – there have been many stories from those attending that have struck the emotional cords of all in attendance. We believe that, as we continue to meet together, over the next 5 sessions, that everyone involved will grow through their respective experiences of loss, and emerge from dealing with their pain stronger and more resilient.

We will add more stories from the groups and experiences through the coming weeks. Keep checking back and thanks for remembering us and these lives currently on the Lost&Found courses in your prayers.
 

12 responses to “Starting a breakthrough !!”

  1. Dear Joy
    It is so awesome to see the work you continue to do in Swaziland over this long period of time. Meeting you there with Marius and Jodi was certainly a highlight for us. I wish we could be back there with you. God bless you for what you are doing there. Do you have any contact with Pastor Sam and Pastor Ronald in Gege? We continue to support him in small ways with finances and prayers. Much love to you and God bless you for what you are doing.
    Bonnie and George Callahan

  2. That is wonderful!! There is so much pain there in Swazi!! Praying for you all!!

  3. Thanks for sharing this Jumbo. I started something similar when I was doing children’s ministry and it was very beneficial. I’m thrilled you are training leaders, and I’ll be praying that beauty will come from ashes.

  4. Thanks for caring so much. This is a real need and you will grow as you help others to deal with the emotions connected to loss. Praying for all those who are being trained to address this tender subject.

  5. I am SO pumped that this is happening – was looking on the organizations website facingupsa org
    and am impressed with all of the volunteers and the values

    I pray that while you are ministering and receiving training , that God will reassure and comfort you, resourcing you to equip others with emotional skills…….

    of course, I am also so excited to get more updates about what is going on through our church’s team members connecting up with you in the next week –

    God strengthen you and give you deep deep joy and peace!

  6. You guys are amazing (Or should we rather declare that God is doing amazing things through you?) Either way, in every way, you are a real encouragement to all.
    Thank you so much for caring where we can’t, and for sharing (your hopes, dreams, vision, and achievements)- so that we can.
    We love you guys and pray for you regularly.

  7. that’s great to hear that you guys are starting a support group for the hurting 🙂 I pray it would help heal and bring people closer to Christ.

  8. Yea! I like seeing them with paper and crayons/pencils/pens. We did that with traumatized children in Haiti, and along with caring adults processing/prayer ministering through what they color/write/draw, this is one of the most helpful ways of helping children deal with real pain.